Thought Trains and Food Chains

Do you ever catch yourself within a train of thought and wonder how you got there?

In art class today we watched a film about an artist called Harry Clarke [more on him later. maybe.]

Clarke suffered from tuberculosis and it eventually took him at the ripe age of 41. 

I found myself profoundly encouraged to see the great work that he made despite his chronic illness. 

Why? I asked myself.

Because a few months ago a guy I respected looked me in the eye and said 

"You know you really have a lot of health problems."

And I believed that. 

And not only did I believe it, but every time I came down with a cold or a slight headache I built upon this theory that I am an invalid and somehow less of a person.

So today, as I was riding full speed ahead on my "lowest of the foodchain" train I suddenly realized that I didn't want to take this line. 

And in that moment I heard God speak to me, clear as day; 

"I made you just the way you are. I love you just the way you are."

And just like that, the train crashed.

When I made this blog I promised myself that I wouldn't put too much personal life out on the internet for everyone to know. I tend to be a private person. 

But maybe vulnerability is what keeps us close. Shoot, a little honesty keeps this thing real.

And now

It is midnight in Belfast.

I have a library to make an appearance in tomorrow.

Goodnight.

✉